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The World Cup is well on the way, and football fever still has South Africa strongly in its grip. SA team Bafana Bafana scored the first goal of the Cup last Friday, gloriously I might add but unfortunately that was the last goal they have scored thus far. In fact we conceded three on Wednesday to Uruguay (at least we have scored one, unlike the Frenchies). The other African teams have also not had much luck; Ghana being the only one to win a game so far. It’s a big downer for us as you can imagine. The biggest African star in the first African World Cup so far, as such, has not been a player but rather what the crowds have been playing – the vuvuzela – a legendary plastic horn. The origin of the horn is contested, some saying it developed from the kudu horn, used in (unnamed) cultural traditional ceremonies, other fans claim they were the first to make them out of aluminium, and yet others claim it started (like most plastic trinkets) in China.

This plastic horn instrument has become both the festive trademark of Africa’s first World Cup, but also the black sheep, and the bane of many an international ear. These droning babies, with their distinctive Bflat tone are so loud that they could cause permanent damage if exposed to for an extended period of time (like a 90-minute football game). I’m thinking of starting an earplug business and retiring early.

Players like Portugal’s Ronaldo have been complaining that they can’t communicate on the pitch, and there have been numerous calls to ban the little blasters. On Tuesday, the BBC even announced that they are planning vuvuzela-free broadcasts, somehow giving a “clean feed of the game” by muting the B-Flat frequency. Despite the outcry, Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu has officially endorsed it and FIFA’s big dada, Sep Blatter, tweeted (yes, he’s on Twitter) that the vuvuzela is here to stay as it’s part of Africa’s football culture. One thing I agree with him on. This is how football games sound here. We are hosting. You’re in our house now, Like Montell Jordan said, “This is How We Do It. “

As far as I can tell, a little place I call the World is just as much into it as well. A Dutch software company just developed a vuvuzela i-phone application, our stadiums are sounding like giant beehives and people are selling the instrument on streets around the world. China is apparently the biggest manufacturer of the “instrument”. It’s here to stay. Once the World Cup is done you won’t have to hear them anymore so enjoy the din while you can. If you can’t get your hands on one where you are, here’s a web- based vuvuzela you can try out…
VIVA VUVUZELA!